Time to Talk

Sometimes I am a little overwhelmed by the amount of change that we have seen in our lifetimes.  We've seen the advent of cordless phones, cell phones, computers, and tablets that weren't even thought of on Star Trek (although they nearly got the cell phones right).  I have just finished setting up my ipad to be able to take it on a trip abroad so I can check the weather, restaurant menus, e-mail, and tourist sites while I am there.  Sometimes I find that I am so involved with the technology of living that I forget to look around. 

However, there has been a price paid for the convenience of all the technology that we have.  Instead of making more time for us it seems to just suck up all the time that we have.  Now our lives are so filled with "things" and "things to do" that we often don't have time to listen and talk.  In fact talking, real conversation talking, is about to become a thing of the past.  Now we e-mail, instant message, forward, social network, and even share pictures without ever having to see or talk to real person. 

Back in the "dark ages" when we were growing up things were a little different. 

One of the first things that we learned in our house, was that talking was fun.  It seemed like there was always a group of adults visiting around the kitchen table, swapping stories on the porch, sharing concerns (gossip) with the neighbors, or telling jokes in the living room.  Children learned the art of listening and being invisible.  If you got caught looking too interested you got sent outside before you heard the juicy parts.  Now, before you start to think my parents didn't do anything but talk, remember that it was a different time.  Parents worked long hours but when they came home they didn't sit and watch tv for hours, hole up with the computer for a night of surfing, or spend hours texting.  Our entertainment was people.

One of the best parts of growing up in a gregarious family was that you learned to listen as well as talk.  Sunday dinners were the best times.  We would gather around the big table in the dining room with all the generations represented, from Granddaddy down to the babies (we had a big piece of plastic kept just to put under their chairs for easy clean-up).  Conversation was an art with everyone being encouraged to participate.  Early during the meal it would be general talk with everyone catching up on the happenings of the day, but later when the dessert was served we got down to serious "yarning".  This was when the older ones would loosen their belts and settle in for some real, old time, story telling.  They would warm up with stories about escapades that our parents got into growing up, move on to tales of some of their contemporaries, and end up with sagas of their own youthful adventures and tribulations.  We would sit enthralled until a general nap time was declared (For the adults not the kids.  We went out to play.).

The youth of today are missing out on an important part of life...learning about and from your elders.  Without a lot of talking you can't learn that your mom suffered from a broken heart at fourteen and thought her life was over, just like you did.  You can't discover that your dad didn't make the high school team his first try either.  You can't appreciate the shear hard work that your grandfather put in farming without high tech equipment or the terror your grandparents felt when polio was striking young people down.  There is a lot of sharing that can only take place when we take the time to sit down and listen and talk.  Even the instant technology of today can't replace that.