In-Laws and Out-Laws

My daughter has the best in-laws. 

You know when you marry you don't give a lot of thought to the parents and siblings of your love.  However, you really should take a long look at his (or her) family before you decide to tie the knot.  After all that knot is going to tie you to these people for better and for worse for the rest of your life.  Not only will they be a part of your family but they will be in on every decision that you make.  They will have their two cents worth to say on when you have children, how many you have, where you will live, what you will do for a living, how you will spend that living and on and on.  I know.  I have been both a daughter-in-law and mother-in-law.  I've seen it from both sides.  Trust me take a long look!!

You can tell a lot about how you and your husband will fight by looking at how your husband's family settles their arguments.  Do they compromise and end peacefully or do they fight it to the bitter end and whine?  Do they yap about every little thing or keep it bottled up until it's a big explosion?  Do they reason or shout?  After all you do tend to carry these traits on into your own marriage.  I once knew a couple who loved nothing better than a good war.  Every fight became a campaign to get everyone in the family to take sides and fight it out.  I wouldn't have lasted two days before I was running for cover. 

You also tend to parent like your parents did.  So look at how these people relate to their children.  Are they supportive or always negative.  Do they tend to make all their children's decisions or step back and let them decide their lives?  Do they nag and pick or just suggest and drop it?  Not only do you lean toward the parenting skills that you were raised with, but some parents never quit being the "all knowing" parents.  They will still try to make your decisions and guide your lives.   Can you live with that?

I don't know if my daughter actually thought of any of these things when she was falling in love, but she sure came up trumps.  Her in-laws are supportive without smothering, loving, encouraging, helpful and kind.  They are truly a Norman Rockwell family that loves each other and enjoys spending time together.  They have opened their hearts and welcomed her as another daughter.  I feel very blessed that she has this second mother to go to whenever she needs to.  If you have to send your child 700 miles away to live at least I can rest knowing that she has a loving family to support her every day. 

Thanks for being her loving family.