Wrens and Owls

I once heard a speaker discuss the two types of people--wrens and owls.  She said that wrens wake up in the morning ready to whip the world into shape but think the day is pretty well over after noon.  Owls on the other hand think the day doesn't really get into swing until about 3 pm but think mornings are for someone else.  The interesting thing is that wrens always marry owls.  I have questioned couples for over 30 years on this topic and I can assure you it is true.  If you are an owl you will marry a wren and spend the rest of your life trying to figure out how anyone can be that chipper in the morning.

The other interesting thing is that owls and wrens can be either sex.  In our house I am definitely the wren.  I wake up in the morning with my mind already at top speed.  That's when I want to discuss the really interesting questions like "Do you think the Dali Lama would make a good president?" or "What do you think of adding another bedroom onto the house?" or "Did you know there were more Americans killed during the Civil War than in World War II?"  I am cheerful, enthusiastic and eager.  My hubby is not. 

He is most definitely an owl.  He hates to get up in the morning and can't see one reason to be cheerful about it.  He does not want to discuss world policy--he really doesn't even want to talk.  He wants coffee, food, more coffee and peace and quiet.  He really doesn't hit his stride until about noon and gains speed for the rest of the day.  He is the type of person who thinks 9 pm is a great time to start cleaning out the basement.  I, on the other hand, am all but comatose by 9 pm.  It's made an interesting life.

Some ground rules had to be established to prevent bloodshed.  When we first married we both had jobs, so we both had to get up and get out in the mornings.  We each set our own alarm so we would have time to juggle the bathroom and get ready.  I would get up early, hit the bath, and while I was showering his alarm would go off.  So he would turn it off to sleep another few minutes until I got out of the shower.  That made it my job to wake him up and get him moving.  Sometimes this would take going back to the bedroom several times, since he would go back to sleep for another few zzzzz's.   That would mess up my schedule and frankly irritate me mightily.  Finally, I just refused to go back and wake him up.  Eventually, after being late to work a few times he learned to get up on his own. 

On my side, I've had to learn to curb my urge to talk in the mornings.  I have found that that is not a good time to discuss the problems with children, the state of the garden, my plans for home projects, or anything that requires thought and cooperation.  Since he is ready to take these issues on when I'm ready for bed with one eye already closed, we have had to compromise.  We can discuss things best during the afternoons or early evenings, if we aren't occupied with chores or work.  Which doesn't happen often, so most discussion become a series of quick comments over a period of days.   We were verbally "texting" before the kids invented it.

The nice thing about being married as long as we have is that you kind of adjust to each other.  I'm still a wren but I have learned to go back to sleep when the alarm goes off in the morning.  Even after the third time.  He's still an owl but he has learned to endure my chatter in the mornings and let me sleep while he watches ballgames at night.  We still tend to discuss things with me following him around as he does chores. Believe me those cows have heard everything!

I guess owls and wrens  balance pretty well, after all.